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How do you rebel in a family full of rebels?

How do you rebel in a family full of rebels?

by RISQ Consulting / Tuesday, 19 February 2019 / Published in Blog

By Tonya Mott

My house is full of Rebels! I may be obligated to post a warning sign on my front door:

How do I know my house is full of Rebels? My colleague, Ashley Snodgrass, shared The Four Tendencies quiz with our office and it was all downhill from there.

The Four Tendencies explain why we act and why we don’t act.  Basically, how people tend to respond to expectations: outer expectations (a deadline, a “request” from a sweetheart) and inner expectations (write a novel in your free time, keep a New Year’s resolution).

Each of the Four Tendencies are summarized as:

  • Upholders respond readily to outer and inner expectations
  • Questioners question all expectations; they’ll meet an expectation if they think it makes sense
  • Rebels resist all expectations, outer and inner alike
  • Obligers meet outer expectations, but struggle to meet expectations they impose on themselves

I took the quiz, I made my reluctant husband take the quiz, and I self-diagnosed my four-year-old daughter…and surprise! We are all Rebels! 

The results indicated that our Rebel motto is:

“I do what I want, in my own way. If you try to make me do something—even if I try to make myself do something—I’m less likely to do it.”

Now these results might seem to cause constant discord, but for the most part, we have tons of fun together and the love is always there. However, this has put me on a journey to figure out how we can use this knowledge of our tendencies to live in a more consistent, and predictable harmony.

If you think you may be living and working with Rebels (or perhaps the Rebel is you) take the tendency quiz to gather more insight on why you and those around you react to expectations the way they do.

Click here to take the Four Tendencies Quiz!

To learn more about the tendencies and improve my communication with others here are the resources I’m using:

Book:  The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin

Blog:  https://gretchenrubin.com/blog/

Podcast:  https://gretchenrubin.com/podcasts/ (also available on apple and Spotify – Happier with Gretchen Rubin)

App – https://gretchenrubin.com/books/the-four-tendencies/the-app/

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