By Taylor Brouillet-Stock, Account Specialist
I was listening to the podcast On Purpose by Jay Shetty and a particular episode really started to resonate with me. In this episode Jay argues that there are 8 types of people that everyone needs in their life. At the end of the episode, Jay makes a great point; If we want these types of people in our life, we must first be these people for others. He also encourages us to reach out to these people and express our gratitude towards them for their influential role in our lives.
Take a look at these 8 types of people and try to think about who in your life falls into these categories. Also, are you doing any of this for the people in your life?
These are the people that always cheer you on. They are the ones to call you up to congratulate you, no matter how big or small the accomplishment. These people believe in you and always seek to point out the good in you. It’s not that they think you’re a flawless human (they are not naïve), but they just focus in on all that is worthy inside of you and make it their mission to point it out. Cheerleaders push you and notice the brilliance in you. Jay maintains that the best way to find cheerleaders is to cheer others on. Who are you cheering on?
Someone who checks you
The people who check us are the uncomfortable people in our life. This is someone who reminds you of your truth, who you are, and what you’ve been through. People who check you may not always have sincere intentions. They may be envious or jealous, but they are still one of your strongest allies. By being checked, you are forced to reprioritize or refocus when things have gone off track. Whether they are doing it for the right or wrong reasons, they can be very powerful and beneficial in your life.
Someone that cares for you
People who care for us tend to be people we spend a lot of time with and usually play a big role in our lives. Jay reminds us to make sure we are caring for the people who are caring for us. The people who truly care for us do what they say they’re going to do. Do you do what you say you’re going to do for others?
Someone with high character
This is a person who represents all the values we appreciate. They remind us of our north star. These are the people who remind us of how we want to live.
Someone competent in areas you want to grow
This can be a coach, teacher, or anyone who is competent or passionate in an area that you admire. It’s possible that we will meet a lot of people until we find the right person to teach us. Once you do, it’s so rewarding to use their wisdom to grow rather than always trying to figure it out yourselves.
Someone who is consistently there
These are people you can call up at any time and you know they’ll be there. These people are extremely underrated, and they are the people who have been in your life consistently. Jay reminds us to not undervalue these people and that they stay around because they love you and value you.
Someone that champions you
This is someone who isn’t always there and isn’t always accessible, but if you reach out, they’ll champion you. This comes by trying to offer support. Make sure you have something to offer these people as well.
Someone that challenges you
These people challenge your ideas, thoughts, and the way you believe. This can be someone you don’t agree with, or who doesn’t agree with you. It can even be someone you may not vibe with. This might be someone who doesn’t care about you, but they still serve a purpose and can be of support to you.
So, ask yourself; Who are you being a cheerleader for? Who are you consistently there for? Who are you championing and who are you challenging? And don’t the people who do these things for you deserve to know their impact?
If you want to listen to this episode, or other episodes by Jay Shetty, his podcast can be found on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and even Youtube! You can also find the link to this specific episode below. Happy Listening!
By Jennifer Outcelt, Creative Content Architect
I was a bit stressed starting this blog post.
You see, I follow this AMAZING podcast called Ologies, by Alie Ward, which explores the study of anything that can be studied with an -ologist of that field. Their tag line is, “Ask smart people stupid questions.” I’m a huge advocate for lifelong learning and continuous curiosity and this podcast meets all my needs. I was stressed because I wanted to do this podcast (and these specific episodes) enough justice that it didn’t end up buried in the “unsolicited podcast suggestion” graveyard.
The episodes that I want to share with you are called “Fearology” and they cover the nature of fear and our human fear responses. It’s a scary good, two-part episode with the fearologist, Mary Poffenroth.
The most notable knowledge nuggets that I walked away with were:
- There are two types of fear, and your amygdala (which controls your stress response) can’t really tell the difference between them.
- Factual fears – actual threats to your life that are happening in a shared reality.
- Fictional fears – everyday fears that are not actual threats to your life (AKA most of the stupid stuff you stress on constantly).
- There are two categories of fictional fears
- The fear of being not enough.
- The fear of not being in control.
- Researchers analyzed the vocabulary of super successful people and found that they used the terms “fear” and “afraid” most, as compared to less successful people who used the term “stress” most.
I desperately want you to love Ologies for two reasons:
- I want you to be part of the community that appreciates and talks about this mind-blowing content.
- I want your life to be better and if you just listened to this podcast then I swear it would change your life and you’ll have a newfound love for all the wonder of the day to day and please, please, PLEASE, just listen to it!!!
Interestingly, my stress around sharing this post played their parts perfectly within my reasons listed above. I desperately want you to love Ologies because I want my interest to be validated in your eyes, AND I want to exert a small amount of control over what you listen to because I think it’s in your best interest. I was afraid of rejection and lack of control. My stress about sharing this was not stress at all… it was FEAR!
These “Fearology” episodes opened my eyes to how I miss identify fear as stress. They also gave me some great tools for owning and managing my fears. Here’s a yummy slice from the episode to wet your palate. I hope you give the full episodes a listen (or read; episode 1 & episode 2). And heck, while you’re at it… Give all the rest of them a listen too.
“In western society, we have this stress ‘badge of courage’. When you ask someone how they are: “Oh my God, I’m so stressed!” “Like, Oh my God, me too! There’s the kids and there’s the work and there’s the other things!” So we feel confident talking about stress because we can commiserate, but we don’t feel confident talking about the ‘f-word’ because there’s so much shame associated with fear in our society, and we are never taught how to deal with fear in a healthy way. When looking at fictional fears, most fictional fears will fit into one of two categories: either the fear of being not enough, or the fear of not being in control. So if you can kind of go back to that and say, “Okay, which category does this fit in?” Sometimes that will Name it to claim it. Identify it so the power goes away. Just [fingersnap] click you right out of the fear response. [Alie gasps] Yeah, it’s so fun because humans love to pigeonhole. We have an entire store called The Container Store [Alie laughs] because we love boxes so damn much!”
“Fearology” Episode 1: https://omny.fm/shows/ologies-with-alie-ward/fearology-pt-1-fear-with-mary-poffenroth
“Fearology” Episode 2: https://omny.fm/shows/ologies-with-alie-ward/fearology-pt-2-fear-with-mary-poffenroth
ALL Ologies Episodes: https://www.alieward.com/ologies